Pirates of the St Lawrence versus Inverhaugh Cricket Club
Saturday 22 June 2013
By Lord Legless

”The radar says that the rain will stop at 2:00,” announced Bart to the two teams huddled beneath the wooden pavilion. The players looked at the Inverhaugh captain skeptically. Outside, a wall of cascading water nearly obscured the pristine pitch as thunder boomed and lightning lit the sky. The Pirates had driven all the way from Montreal in the hopes of teaching Ontarians a thing or two about cricket, and were gloomily contemplating a cricketless weekend in the Greater Toronto Area.

Miraculously, at 2:00, the rain let up, covers were dragged off, sandwiches were consumed, and play began with the Pirates in the misty field, wondering how they’d managed to get there.

Robinson and Legault found the ball swinging nicely in their opening overs, sometimes to their advantage, and sometimes to the advantage of the home team, whose rules deemed anything leg-side or a foot outside the stumps on the off-side a wide.

Robinson struck first blood for the Montrealers, bamboozling Allamby into edging into the sure hands of wicketkeeper Varma, and sending the number two back to the pavilion with his duck in tow. Legault bowled the tightest overs of his young season, and was rewarded by flying bails and stumps as opener R. Walia stumbled over his inswinging yorker.

A 50-run partnership followed, with former Canadian national team wicketkeeper RB Singh and M. Walia making the most of their singles and doubles in a sluggish field. Pirate Thapa finally put an end to the Inverhaugh double-threat by dazzling Walia with swing and pace, once again sending the bails clattering.

Moore, the second former Canadian national team player on the Inverhaugh squad, took to the wicket and signalled his intent by spraying long drives into the field. Wily Carter, the Pirates’ veteran spinner was nonplussed, however, and tempted Moore into one lofted drive too many, which was swallowed deftly by Legault on the boundary at long on.

Captain Singh stepped in next, batting alongside his brother, who continued to pile on the runs. Twice the captain was dropped in the covers by Julius, who must have been troubled by nightmares for weeks afterwards, but who got his revenge by collaborating with Bell in claiming the Inverhaugh skipper’s wicket in a calamitous run-out. Julius’s redemption was almost complete when he managed to snag one off the bowling of Louis, retiring Smith for a mere 3 runs.

After some solid, tight bowling by youngster Ramcharram, the lower-order batsmen fell in quick succession, with Bell claiming two scalps, bowling one, and catching another standing in front of the stumps, while Varma took his second catch of the day off the steady bowling of Thapa.

The Pirates, apart from one or two blips, were as tight in the field as the shutters on an Ontario Beer Store after 5 PM. They chased, threw, threatened, and harried the Inverhaugh batsmen, making them work hard for each of their runs. Varma in particular put on a spectacular show behind the bails, snagging stray deliveries and keeping the batsmen at their respective ends. The final 7 batsmen put a mere 17 runs on the board, leaving RB Singh to do all the heavy lifting, and at the end of 30 overs, Inverhaugh had registered a very chaseable 144.

Drinks done, it was straight out to the wicket for the Pirates, and with the heat drying out the field, they had their sights firmly set on victory.

Fate (and some national-class bowling by Moore) had other plans in store for the Pirates, however, and number two Ashtaputre only saw two balls before hanging his bat out to dry and edging behind. Opener Hasan stayed bravely for 23 balls before surrendering his wicket, confounded by Moore’s pace, line and length. Robinson, upon whom the Pirates were pegging hopes for a long innings, fell to the quick hands of RB Singh (did I mention he played for Canada?), stumping the Aussie as his toe hovered above the short grass. After Varma fell to an unfortunate run-out, the Pirates were looking very ragged at 19 for 4. Could this be the end for our heroes?

Well, not yet. Bell and Julius went to work and doubled the Pirates’ total, putting 39 runs on the board before Bell’s innings came to an uncharacteristically premature end, nicking a slow left arm turner into the waiting hands of RB Singh. Legault was next into the breach, and notched 5 runs before Moore brought some ironic symmetry to the match by executing an acrobatic one-handed leaping catch at cover, sending the man who caught him out back to the cooler confines of the pavilion.

Julius was on fire, scoring runs at a torrid pace, while Louis and newcomer Ramcharram were both awarded golden ducks, the latter entering the hallowed halls of the Pirates’ Golden Duck on Debut Club.

The writing was on the wall for the Pirates at this stage, and when Carter’s bat went silent after 4 runs, and Thapa went down lbw, the Pirates hopes were as flat as the Inverhaugh outfield; the only bright point being Julius’s rollicking 45 not out.

Speeches, gifts, and lashings of beer and curry picked up the Pirates’ spirits, and the fun lasted long into the evening.

Pirates of the St Lawrence versus Inverhaugh Cricket Club
Saturday 22 June 2013
Inverhaugh, near Guelph, Ontario
Match type: 30 overs per side
Weather conditions: Thundershowers till 2 pm
Result: Inverhaugh CC won by 59 runs

Inverhaugh CC Innings

Extras 29 (Byes 2, Leg Byes 4, No Balls 1, Wides 22)
Total 144 for 9 in 30 overs

FoW (1-1, 2-28, 3-79, 4-90, 5-97, 6-108, 7-126, 8-134, 9-139)

Pirates of the St Lawrence Innings

Extras 16 (Byes 4, Leg Byes 1, No Balls 0, Wides 11)
Total 85 for 10 in 30 overs

FoW (1-1, 2-14, 3-16, 4-19, 5-48, 6-69, 7-69, 8-69, 9-85, 10-85)